Super Sugar Crisp/Coffee Conspiracy

ssc

I’m not a big coffee drinker.  I mean, yes, I have coffee, but I don’t really like it all that much.  I hardly ever go to Starbucks, and I never drink coffee in a restaurant unless I am completely hung over or if it’s an Irish Coffee – which is really just a warm whisky delivery system.  But, sometimes I do drink coffee just for the hell of it (although I have to drink it with a packet of Sweet ‘n Low and sometimes milk) and I recently made an odd discovery.

I always noticed when I drank mainstream coffee like Folgers or Maxwell House with my little burst of fake sugar it tasted like… something.  Something familiar.  Something from a long time ago.  I don’t know when I realized it, but suddenly I knew what it was.  It was Super Sugar Crisp. Yes,  coffee with sugar and milk tastes exactly like a big bowl of my favorite childhood cereal, Super Sugar Crisp.  (Yes, I know they did away with the ‘sugar’ in the name way back in the 80s sometime and now it is Super Golden Crisp, but it will always be Super Sugar Crisp to me.)

So, I began to think about why in the hell does Super Sugar Crisp taste like coffee?  Was it to hook children on the taste of coffee at young age so they would like crummy coffee later in life?  If so, who would benefit from such a clandestine scheme?  The Post Coprporation is the manufacturer of Super Sugar Crisp.  Do they own a coffee brand?  Well, strangely enough – yes.

A cursory Google on the Post corporation shows that Post began marketing Maxwell House coffee in 1929.  Super Sugar Crisp was introduced in 1949.  Post later became General Foods and Maxwell House was the #1 coffee brand in the United States well into the 1980s. 

Another cursory Google seems to show that I am the first person to stumble upon this vast conspiricy to hook kids on crappy coffee though the use of crappy cereal.  How deep does this conspiracy go?  Who knew what when?  Am I in danger exposing this vast ploy? 

Coincidence?  You be the judge….

13 thoughts on “Super Sugar Crisp/Coffee Conspiracy

  1. I love coffee, but drink it black, so I can’t speak to your conspiracy, but I’ll tell you: there are times when, through some combination of foods I’ve eaten, my pee smells exactly like Super Sugar Crisp. And yes, as a child of the sixties, it will most definitely ALWAYS be Super Sugar Crisp.

  2. Whoa, that was heavy. What kinds medication are you on? I need to get some, for sure! Good work, inch high private eye.

    Have you ever thought about the Scooby Doo gang? Seriously, there is some deep shit going on there. Think about it….Scrappy Doo is a dog, but speaks perfect English? WTF? Can you save “love child” of Velma and Scooby? Hell yeah!

  3. Sugar bear was the ultra cool dude who would save the damsel tied to the railroad tracks and kick snidely whiplash booty while eating a bowl of sugar crisp. There was always a non-cool dude standing by with a wistful “i’d like to help…” but since he hadn’t had his sugar crisp, was basically worthless. Yeah, it made an impression on me.

  4. Yes indeed. Super Sugar Crisp/Super Golder Crisp…they smell and taste just like coffee. I’ve always thought the same thing. I want some of this cereal so bad!!!

  5. I agree with your theory %100!!! also – this is a spa treatment in some places – but if you rub coffee all over you and then rinse it off, YOU smell like Sugar Crisp! (it’s called Sugar Crisp up here in Canada)

    The coffee grounds on your skin tightens and invigorates it 🙂

  6. I’ll do your conspiracy one further.
    Did you ever notice that the shape of the cerials in the Super Sugar Crisps were like that of a coffee bean? I noticed this one day looking at coffee beans, and the shape reminded me of something.
    What I would like to know is whether the cereal contained caffeine. It would not surprise me if it did. The earliest Cola drinks tried to hook people with the byproducts of the cola nut (Cocaine, COKa Cola, PEPsi cola), and when they had to stop, they switched to caffeine. So why not hook kids on caffeine and sugar?

  7. You are not alone with your discovery. I shared the belief with a number of friends back in college – some 25 years ago. They all thought I was as empty as Rice Crispies until we got our hands on a box of the cereal. Then they realized it too.

  8. So funny! I’ve always thought Golden Crisps taste like coffee! I did a Google Search “Am I the only one who thinks golden crisps taste like coffee” and I found this. Well, glad to see I’m not the only one… Lol

  9. I don’t know if this has any correlation but, I ate a rather large bowl of Golden Crisp early in the day yesterday. Come night, I slept for maybe 3 hours or so and have been awake ever since. I went to sleep around 10 pm woke around 1 am…it’s 7 am. I’m trying to find out if there was caffeine in them but, it still shouldn’t affect me like over 12 hours later…and I wish my coffee DID taste like Golden Crisp. I’d be addicted.

  10. Uncanny logical progression of thought in this capitalist age!

    I JUST this minute said to my bright eyed 10 year old “this coffee tastes just like Sugar-Crisp, I wonder if that is to hook you on coffee later in life? I bet the makers of Sugar-Crisp make coffee too. Let’s google it!”

    Your post (lol) was the FIRST hit!

    I looked my kid straight in the eye and told him “If you can think of it, someone else has tried it or is working on it and it is not a conspiracy.”

    Way to start my morning!

    Breakfast cereal is the food of subversion!

    • This is Tiffany, I’m just not logged it. That is great! Thanks for sharing… glad I am not the only one… 🙂

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