The Scariest Children’s Book in the World: Chapter 4

Oops – the dumb ass kittens didn’t take off the crazy mittens when they ate their danish, so now they have to wash them in a tub full of melted ice cream.  Oh, wait…that’s soap.  Of course the girls are doing the washing while Cross Eyed Tabby Boy gets the water. They must be using SURF detergent with all that foam.

The ladder is an interesting touch.  What’s it for?

New crackhead kitty for this page:

The Scariest Children’s Book of All Time: Chapter 2

Welcome to Chapter Two of the suspenseful thriller: The Three Little Kittens.

This is the plot twist in this story where the three little zombie cats miraculously find their mittens a mere one second after losing them and told they will get no pie.  So, I don’t get it.  This twist is so boring, that they geniuses at Rose Art Studios had absolutely nothing to work with as far as this picture goes. The kittens are just standing in a shag carpet field with paws in the air like they just don’t care.  And why do their mittens have thumbs when the kittens don’t?

Oh, and our favorite gingham kitten is missing an iris.

The Scariest Children’s Book of All Time: Chapter 1

Okay, cheezy props aside, what the hell were these people thinking with the eyes on these zombie cats?   I mean, seriously, something is very wrong with them… especially the one in the gingham overalls.  There’s something not quite right about him.  Actually, they are all hideous – they scare the hell out of me!

And, Im trying to figure out the scale here.  Are they giant puppets and the props are regular size?  Or, are they tiny and the props are doll house size? For some reason, I feel that they are in-between and the props were somehow made for this shoot.  What’s up with that blue lantern-thingy?  Are those balls of string for knitting or batting around the house?  Why is there a fish embroidered on the mommy cat’s apron?  Why is this all so fucking creepy????

The Scariest Children’s Book of All Time

Ladies and Gentlemen:  I give you the most frightening children’s book of all time.  This was a gift to me by a good friend.  This was hers as a child and she said at the time she was somewhat obsessed with it.  For some reason, she thought I would appreciate the incredible oddness that permeates this classic tale of the three little kittens who lose their mittens.  I will be posting the entire book this week.

A little background: The book is labeled to be from the Renewal Products Incorporated Eduacational Games and Aids Division.  Now if that doesn’t sound like fun fucking company, then I don’t know what does!  The oddness begins on the first page, where we find out that actually, this is a Japanese publication.  The copyright is from 1971 from the Frobel-Kan Company Limited and says it was printed and bound in Japan.  Oh, and the “pictures” are attibuted to the Rose Art Studios.  And wait until you see the magical work of these studios!  Avatar got nothin’ on them!

So, as we see on the beautiful cover, the three little kittens are washing their mittens among some sort shag carpet and chroma-key background.  I keep expecting to see a weather map behind them.  Obviously no kitten can wash anything without using CAT SOAP POWDER, because using DOG SOAP POWDER would be suicide back in the 70s.  And what shag carpet would be complete without plastic flowers strategically placed around the wash bucket?  Oh, Rose Art Studios, your composition skills wow and amaze….

Stay tuned tomorrow for Chapter One.