Seinfeld: Bubble Boy (Not Balloon Boy)

For some reason, whenever I have been talking about the Balloon Boy or his idiotic father, I keep saying ‘Bubble Boy”.  It must be a side effect of watching too much Seinfeld. So, I figured maybe it was a good time to post this little clip for the real Bubble Boy.


PS: Speaking of Balloon Boy, chalk it up to my old home state to be home to yet another nutball.  And, they live in Ft. Collins no less – home to my hapless Rams.  (And, a hapless Sheriff’s Dept, apparently.)

Congratulations Rammies!


A big congratulations to my Colorado State Rams for the upset of the week – beating the annoying CU Buffaloes yesterday while being 10 1/2 point underdogs.  The last time the Rammies beat the Buffs at Folsom Field was 23 years ago, when I was a freshman!

Suck it, Buffs!

I’m Proud… To Be… A CSU Ram!


Yes, it’s time for something BIG in my hometown of Denver this weekend!

No, not that silly Democratic Convention thingy.  It’s time once again for the ROCKY MOUNTAIN LETDOWN, oops… I mean SHOWDOWN between the Lovable Loser Colorado State University Rams and the Annoying Asshole University of Colorado Buffaloes.

I won’t repeat what I said last year about this subject, except to say that unfortunately I won’t be attending the game this year as I will be on a plane to Paris.  But, I still want to wish my hapless Rammies good luck and say that no matter what, I’ll still love ya.

Go Ram’s!

Farewell Buckingham Square Mall


I received an email from a friend I’ve known since third grade telling me that they are going to demolish the mall nearest my childhood home in lovely Aurora, Colorado – the Buckingham Square Mall. Buckingham Square, opened in 1971, was always kind of a “sad”mall – you know, the type that just is never as fancy and flashy as the newer malls.  But, it was our mall.  And it was where my parents took me each year to see the Christmas decorations and Santa.  (Turns out that they were using the exact same decorations now – see picture above.  Yes, that was my Christmas magic as a child.  Not exactly Marshall Fields on State Street…)
I worked in this mall all through high school at the Original Great American Chocolate Chip Cookie Company.  I bought clothes at Stage (a subsidary of Fashion Bar), I ate at Round the Corner and Orange Julius.  I bought records and tapes at Musicland.  At work I watched the 20-something guys of Aurora buy sweet clothes at Chess Club and the old people dine at Wag’s – located inside the Walgreens. I watched the women of Aurora get free makeovers at Merle Norman and buy wigs made by Barbara Mandrell at the Wig Shoppe next door.  I bartered free cookies for free movie tickets and watched Pee Wee’s Big Adventure in the Buckingham Square Mall Theater at least 20 times.
This mall had character because it never changed once since 1971.  No remodel, no upgrade – it remained exactly the same from the day it opened to the day it closed. It was ugly, outdated, and frankly smelled of desperation when I worked there in the mid-80s, but dammit, it was ours!
 Turns out I am not the only one who felt a little nostalgic about the place.  Soon after I received the first email about the mall demolition, another friend sent me the link to a guy who went into the deserted mall and took some interesting pictures and made a YouTube tribute to the old gal.  (See below for the movie.)
Anyway, farewell Buckingham Square Mall and all your memories.  Enjoy your new life as a mixed-use megaplex, full of contrived charm and generic mega stores.  (We really do need more Panera Breads and Home Depots, don’t we?)

Go Ram’s!


Well, it’s that time of year again… Time to travel to Denver in a couple of weeks and watch my poor beleaguered CSU Rams try and beat the annoying CU Buffs.

If you don’t know what I am talking about, then you aren’t from Denver. The Rocky Mountain Showdown (or as my good freind JMo calls it, The Rocky Mountain Letdown) is one of the biggest sports events in Denver, selling out the 76,000 seats at Mile High Stadium each year. (Yes, I know it’s officially “INVESCO Field at Mile High”, but I can’t bring myself to say that ridiculous name.)

The college rivalry has been going on and off since 1893 – where CSU didn’t win until 1912 – and is now considered a cemented rivalry game since 1983. Total record? Buffs: 57, Rams: 21 (I counted the two ties to CSU for obvious reasons.) And, I might mention, the Rams lost 3 out of the 4 years I attended CSU.

So, why now do I go each year and put myself through the agony of these games? Because the win is so much more special, I guess. You see, CSU is not only the underdog in Colorado, but the forgotten proverbial red-headed stepchild of Colorado sports. CU and CU Buff fans are always considered the top dog in Denver because they are considered the “rich” and “cool” school while CSU is the state school with the state school budget and the state school fans. Never mind the fact that most students that attend CU are there for the sole fact that their parents have money and most likely weren’t smart enough to get into anything east of the Mississippi if you know what I mean. I mean, where else in the mountain states do you see assholes driving Porches to class and wearing Burberry to a test?

So, for us — the sad CSU fans — the win means we weren’t the underdog for once. We beat the guys with the Burberry and Porsches in our Toyota Tercels and Cherokee, and for once money and influence didn’t mean anything. And, even if we lose, which is more likely than not, we keep coming back each year with that pure hope in our hearts that this year could be different. As my friend Beej says, “We may not be a good lookin’ folk, but we got spirit.”

Amen, Beej.
And, as my Gramatically Incorrect Foam Finger says, “Go Ram’s!”